It's a curious parallel, yes. Not sure they need to, though. Similar with orientation based politics, I figure.

I am pretty asexual, tho as I pointed out in my post to the survey thread, mostly because i cannot negotiate the process of progressing relationships to a sexual level. As I age, and with so little activity, my sex drive has indeed waned, mostly from neglect.

I suspect this process of being so unsucessful, as Mels other thread discussed, may make some folk say, "Oh I didn't really want it anyway." It is much harder emotionally to remain in a place of longign than to just redefine oneself as asexual, and focus on other areas where you can be more sucessful.

Roadmap or guidance for any interactions. LOL!

Okay, I get picked on a lot. Um, and there doesn't seem to be anything that is exempt from being picked on. I realized that the avatar I have up right now hasn't been picked on yet (others I used to use got picked on already). I said something about that, and someone else said they weren't aware that it (picking on my avatar) was in the script.

I replied that I wasn't aware there WAS a script.

The response was that I do indeed know there is a script. Apparently I'm supposed to KNOW what's going on and what I'm supposed to do next. I don't. And they don't believe that I don't KNOW.

No matter how many times I try to explain, the explanation is not accepted. My last analogy on how I feel in this world was "I feel like someone slipped me acid during intermission and shoved me on stage during a performance of the Nutcracker".

Everyone else has their costumes and roles and knows what to do. And I'm in the way, or confused, or think what's going on around me is silly or scary or just weird.

If I don't get regular interactions, I'm not going to get emotional things. And sex is pretty emotional, so that's so far down the list it's not considered as an option. Self-pleasuring, oh, you betcha. But getting involved with other people? I can't even get them to explain what they mean by some comments. Or to accept me as I am. Or to believe that this is what I am.

It would be so easy to take advantage of me because I wouldn't even know it. I wouldn't catch on for a long time. And when I do catch on in those situations, I'm devastated, because I trusted the other person to do the right thing. They didn't. I believed whatever they said and got screwed over as a result.

Secondly, I don't really have ...uh.. I'm not sure how to put this in words. The trust or belief in the other person can be so great that I begin to take on their characteristics? Uh, that's not it, but that's as close as I can come to it right now. Like I get lost in them? Whatever I am starts to fade? I look to them to BE that guide or teacher or roadmap and depend fully on it. Which can put me in some situations that I would otherwise avoid.

I made comments elsewhere before about the whole world corrupts. In a way, it does, for me. If I stay by myself and don't get involved with anyone at all, I'm fairly safe. But even talking to people online, I start to take on whatever I see. If there's chaos and hatred, I reflect that. If I don't see that, if I'm not attacked or picked on, I'm okay.

In one tribe, someone posted a thread awhile back titled "What would you do if you could get away with it?". I'd have to avoid every single person who responded, in real life. Because that mindset would destroy me. People looking to get away with things they shouldn't be doing would destroy me.

Being emotionally and sexually involved REQUIRES someone who can be that guide or teacher or helper AND one who will NOT take advantage or try to get away with things they shouldn't. They'd have to not only understand me, but be really protective. In a way that keeps other people from taking advantage. Otherwise I couldn't go anywhere with that person.

Are there people like that in the world? Not that I've seen. LOL!

Asexuality is a general term or self-designation for people who do not exhibit sexual attraction, or who otherwise find sexual behavior unappealing. There is debate as to whether this is a sexual dysfunction or a sexual orientation. Furthermore, there is disagreement over the exact definition of the word. The term is sometimes used as a gender identity by those who believe their lack of sexual attraction places them outside the traditional definitions of gender. There has been little research done on asexuality, but those studies that have been conducted suggest that, if it is a sexual orientation, it is among the least common.
Contents
[hide]

* 1 Debate
* 2 Research
* 3 Variations
* 4 Asexuality and religion
* 5 Asexuality in fiction
* 6 See also
* 7 References
* 8 External links

[edit] Debate

There is continuing disagreement over whether asexuality is a legitimate sexual orientation. Some argue that it falls under the heading of hypoactive sexual disorder or sexual aversion disorder. Among those who do not believe it to be an orientation, other suggested causes include past sexual abuse,[1] sexual repression (of homosexuality, heterosexuality, or bisexuality), hormonal problems, delayed development, sublimation of sexuality for personal, religious or cultural reasons, or simply not having met the right person. Some asexuals, however, argue that they do not believe in the "right person myth", because they couldn't get into romantic/sexual affection with anybody for long years back and do not create any image of an ideal lover for themselves.

Many self-identified asexuals, however, do not believe that such diagnoses apply to them. Others assert that because their asexuality does not cause them distress, it should not be viewed as a disorder. Those who believe that asexuality is not pathological sometimes point to the fact that similar things have been said about homosexuality and bisexuality, which are now viewed by most as legitimate orientations. Alongside this is the debate as to whether the term 'asexual' is an accurate term. In biology, the term is used to describe a species that reproduces from a single member, whereas in this context it pertains to an organism not reproducing at all, and that 'anti-sexual' (in the clinical, rather than polemical sense) may be a more accurate description of the behavior (for the ideological outlook, see antisexualism).

Because of this lack of research on the subject, there is little documented evidence in favor of either side of the debate.

[edit] Research

A study done on rams found that about 2% to 3% of the animals being studied had no apparent interest in mating with either sex. Another study was done on rats and gerbils, in which up to 12% of the males showed no interest in females. Their interactions with other males were not measured, however, so the study is of limited use when it comes to asexuality.[2]

A UK survey of sexuality included a question on sexual attraction, and 1% of respondents replied that they had "never felt sexually attracted to anyone at all."[3] The Kinsey Institute conducted a small survey on the topic, which concluded that "asexuals appear to be better characterized by low sexual desire and sexual excitation than by low levels of sexual behavior or high sexual inhibition".[4] That study also mentions a conflict regarding the definition of "asexual": the researchers found four different definitions in the literature, and stated that it was unclear whether those identifying as asexual were referring to an orientation.

[edit] Variations

There are differences among people who identify as asexual, chiefly among them the presence or absence of a sex drive or romantic attraction. Some experience only one of these, while others experience both, and still others neither. There is disagreement as to which of these configurations can genuinely be described as asexual. While a number of people believe all four variations qualify, many others believe that to be asexual, one must lack both a sex drive and romantic attraction.

The sex drive of those asexuals who have one is usually not directed at anything, and is only an urge for sexual stimulation or release; one exception is those asexuals who are also fetishists, whose sex drive is focused on the fetish object rather than a person (though many fetishists do not identify themselves as asexual). In either case, the level of sex drive can range from weak to strong, and from rare to frequent. As mentioned above, some identify as asexual yet feel sexual attraction, though some would argue that they are not asexual. Some asexuals may experience sexual feelings, but have an aversion to sex or no desire to act on them, while others seek sexual release through sexual contact.

For those asexuals who experience feelings of romantic attraction, it can be directed towards any sex or sexes. These asexuals generally desire romantic relationships (ranging from casual liaisons to marriage) but often do not want these relationships to include sexual activity. Because of their romantic orientation, some asexuals describe themselves as gay, bi, or straight asexuals; this is related to the concept of affectional orientation.

Hi Prometheus,

You said:
"actually, aspies turn on to energy states rather than to erotic stimulus as such, what turns on an aspie
is thus very different than what turns on most NTs."

I think this is a very interesting, provocative statement
----
really, it seems self evident.
---


and I think you're right -- at least with regard to some people, whether NT or Aspie! I've usually been a pushover for a combination of "chemistry" or "energy" accompanied by eccentric, creative intelligence and a kind heart. Not all NTs like the boring, bland, social superficial stuff!
---
take me to a bar? take me to a concert? TOO MANY!!!

but i define now on my side the things that interest me the most;
can she dance with me as i dance?
can she sing with me as i sing?
can she dream with me as i dream?
can she hold with me a secret focus on an inner star?

will mere fairy dust work for me to get some new "wendy" to fly off with me into a sky
that only i seem to see?

Things reversed themselves in the long run. Now the standard is different. I'm not asexual, i'm just not looking to date outside my species,
i have noticed it causes both sides occasional pain.


If some bright and beautiful young vulunteer wanted to step up to be my handler, that would be awesome, but i don't go looking
for that its too much like prostitution.
I don't know wether or not it can work. but i'd love to try it some days.


If a mind is truly trapped, its simply unatractive. MOST people in the
NT world look disgusting on the IN side.

NTs are in a STATE where they are using their brain as a SEX ORGAN.
Aspies are forced into the position where to compensate, they are using their BRAIN as a sex organ

i want her to have a dozen
PhDs woth of kinowledge, speedread, and trance just like i do.

that doesn't make me asexual, it means that my sexuality is happening in what is for most people an invisible bandwidth.

Oh and his therapist was a dumbass- no offense just stating a fact.... Maybe he couldn't get any and was blaming it on the patient- Fuck if I know- But he was and is and always will be a dumbass- In my own opinion he made a statement that could do to his career what Michael Richards (Kramer's) statements at that comedy club did to his career.

Oh and yeah some aspergers people might be asexual- inasmuch as there are others who are gay straight like to mix it up schtoop midgets or fuck dogs (oh by the way I don't like beastiality so don't ask to videotape me with your german shepherd please)- but to say "ALAS IT IS WRITTEN- Aspergers people don't like to get any! And this is my commandment!" is lame and stupid.

Peace,
-Mike

I don't think the hunt is inherently evil. It's a biological impulse to mate, a psycohological need to feel wanted, a necessary aspect of propegating the species. Some people take things too far, of course, but I think that's a minority. Those guys are just a lot more visible because they spend so much time looking. Women go on the hunt as well, just in (generally) different ways.

I just don't have that drive, or at least don't feel the connection betwen the hunt and the end result. When I have tried it, it just didn't seem worth it. There's so much socializing required and sometimes it leads to sex, but it also leads to hurt feelings, lying, and *gasp* relationships. So I never developed those skills.

your a dork

There's this theory I might have brought up on this thread before that gender variants are self-imposed and even nontransgender males or females impose their own masuline or feminine sets of traits individually- I got it off a Salon.com article I read a while ago. The article was about a woman who spent a day as a man (She even wore an outfit similar to the business suit Eddie Murphy did in the SNL skit where he pretended to be white.... That might've not been on purpose, but I still thought it was cool- cooler so if she was thinking of Saturday Night Live with the suit.)-

Anyway maybe it is or isn't accurate or not but I like that the thought makes me go "Hmmm".....

Peace,
-Mike